Yesterday two of my friends got married. When the ’till death do us part’ moment arrived there were tears in my eyes. I still don’t know whether I was crying because I am not sure I will ever get married, because I am so impressed that they believe in commitment and marriage when less and less people do or just because the moment itself is quite emotional.
I don’t really believe in marriage and this has to do with the fact that my parents got divorced and there aren’t too many couples around me who didn’t anyway. Even the word ‘love’ makes eyebrows raise and people exclaim ‘oh please, you don’t really believe that, do you?’. I also think there are those too complicated, difficult and not so easy to satisfy who can never settle and those who are simply the marrying kind. You surely know stories about people who met in high school, stayed madly in love for 50 years and lived happily ever after. Then one of them dies and in less than one month the other one dies as well. I classify these stories as fairytales.
Yet just because literature, movies and art taught us that the great loves are the crazy ones where everything is twisted, complicated and impossible that doesn’t mean for some love can’t be enough when it’s easy and simple. I often wondered whether a love where there aren’t any tears and slammed doors in act two it’s worth waiting for to see what happens in act three. But there rarely is an act three or an epilogue in l’amour fou.
Right now I can’t picture myself promising I will love and cherish a man for as long as I shall live but I can imagine living beautiful love stories. As I was telling my best friend a few days ago, the one thing I believe in is beauty. And both getting married and not getting married can and have to be beautiful because that’s what life si about. That’s what I wish for my friends as well, to have a beautiful marriage and for the sun to warm them for ever as it did yesterday in the church. Since in my life I am always looking for beauty, maybe one day it will come my way in an unexpected form and I might then change my mind and say those vows. But not knowing for sure, well that’s what makes it beautiful.
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