The most valuable things I have learned so far came from what people are, not from what they do. I keep coming back to this little obsession of mine with people who become human doings rather than human beings and that is because I feel more and more how everything revolves around what we do. And what we do is about succes, and succes is usually measured in fame or money. I, for one, have never shared this commun belief that people can only influence or help others by building something big. And I know at least two of them who can prove my point.

The first is my mother who has never had the successful career most modern women are dying for. She wasn’t a stay at home mum either, but although she has always worked, she managed to be the most wonderful parent I could have ever wished for. She gave me so much love, attention and has helped me try to become the best self I can be. And today, she taught me something once again. She was telling me how my sister who’s studying in an arts school called her crying that she’ll never be good enough with her painting. And my mum told her not to give up every time the road gets rough because all she needs to do is have passion for something. She doesn’t have to be Michelangelo in order to be happy as long as she loves what she’s doing. Mum also said that even though you feel that what you are doing is shit, you could at least try to make that shit an original one. She is now translating a book about Tarantino and told my sister that he was a visionary man, intelligent enough to make art and to innovate something other people threw away. He used violence, kitsch and old actors in order to create an unique style that many have tried to copy years later. Tarantino only made 6 movies but he influenced cinematography simply by pursuing his passion. As a child, he started watching movies with his mother but he didn’t get an expensive education or a luxurious lifestyle. He only wanted to do something he loved and most important, he wanted to be himself. He didn’t want to be Fellini.

The other person is Hannah, my flatmate. She turns 30 in two days and was supposed to go on a lovely trip with her boyfriend. But today she found out he is trapped in Cape Town because of some issues with his visa and won’t be able to make it. I would have freaked out, been mad at him, probably yelled on the phone for hours and then be sad for days.  Hannah, on the other hand, handled this with calm and didn’t, for one second, blame him for something that wasn’t his fault. We’ve been living together for almost 2 years now and all of this time I’ve admired her for her understanding, non-judgemental and compassionate nature. I have learned a lot from what she is like and am trying everyday to be kinder.

There are many other people I’m learning from, however, today I chose to write about those who didn’t build companies, made millions or became famous. And that’s for one simple reason: they are not less happy or less wonderful than those who have.

Tagged: on Friday, November 11, 2011 · 3 Comments »